I was told that I needed to increase my self-love and self-worth in repeating to myself how much I love me and how worthy I am. So I tried telling myself: “I love you, I love you, I am worthy, I am worthy,…”, and I hated it!
It felt so wrong and it put my attention right in the center of the pain. And that is exactly why it didn’t work.
If we are trying to affirm something that is incongruent with a deeply held belief, it is not going to overwrite it. In contrary, it puts the focus straight on the belief and reinforces it, as we give it more power.
If positive affirmations don’t work, what does?
The first step is to always look at: what is it that I feel or believe? Acknowledge it, without giving it any meaning. Note that it is never true that somebody is not good enough, or not worthy (and so on), although a majority of people feels they aren’t.
Then, look at how it impacts your actions. And whenever you feel you can’t or shouldn’t do something because you feel not worthy, not entitled or simply not deserving it, ask yourself: “Is this really true? Or does it just feel like it?”
If the answer is “no”, make sure to act accordingly.
No affirmations are going to change how you feel and how you see your world; it’s your actions that do!