We often try to be likable. But the ones who will like it least, is us. What is this compulsion of pleasing and making everybody comfortable (except for ourselves maybe)? There is a societal need for certain rules and a decent level of respect for each other. Meaning that we listen, we respect other’s opinions and we try to control our triggers as much as we can. But that doesn’t mean we are supposed to… Read More »Don’t be likable
We often talk about happiness and the desire to be happy. In particular in personal development. But what does that really mean? It seems that the mainstream understanding of happiness is basically the opposite equivalent of sadness or pain. And often promoted as the ‘to be achieved standard’ in life. This is not only unrealistic, but also doesn’t do justice to the difficult moments we all experience. Being sad, to my experience, doesn’t exclude being… Read More »About Happiness
Going for something you want, realizing a project, a dream or even a small step or change in your life requires a decision. Not a wish, not a plan, not a “I should” or “I may”. But a decision THAT you are going to do or be something. A well-known proverb says that things start moving your way once you have decided. And this is 100% true. But there is more to it. As long… Read More »The Decision-Making Advantage
Travel is the one thing that brings out the best and the worst in us. Because we put ourselves in a situation where everything is different than usual. When I say travel, I do not mean a three day business trip or a two week vacation in a hotel in one place (although this can be quite challenging too!). What I mean is being “on the road”, being away from our routines at home. Because consciously or… Read More »Travel comes with side effects
Language is powerful! That’s not new. But did you ever consider HOW powerful it is? And how much of the way you experience life daily is related to the way you speak? An example: I am not good at IT (one of my preferred sentences). With this in mind, how am I going to experience the next little hick-up of my laptop? Correct, with a panic attack and lots of anger coming from feeling so… Read More »Language is powerful – we create as we speak
I am not a fan of New Year’s resolutions because generally they don’t last. The reason is that if the motivation for change comes from the hope that with a new year everything will be different, nothing will change. As you will not change anything. I have been struggling with addictive behaviours in my 20s and 30s. And I was hoping that with each move, each new job, each new year, each anniversary, each birthday,…… Read More »Why New Year’s resolutions don’t work
Discover the power of celebrating joy and embracing happiness in life. Explore why many struggle to find joy and pleasure, and learn how nurturing your own happiness can enhance creativity, resilience, and overall wellbeing. We often talk about how to deal with difficult situations, to face our fears, to allow pain and sadness as part of life. Because they are inevitable at times. However, not to be mistaken: we are meant to enjoy life, to… Read More »The power of joy
We all have limiting beliefs about ourselves. The kind of “I am not good enough, I am not worthy, I don’t belong, I am not capable” and so on. They are beliefs because they do not reflect the truth of who we are. They are conclusions we made based on situations where we did not get what we wanted or needed. Often these happened far back in early childhood. As we have cultivated them since,… Read More »Don’t believe your beliefs!
Consciousness is our capacity to observe ourselves, our thoughts and feelings. It is not easy to step out of our minds, to take the distance to look at its messages with curiosity. We usually take all thoughts and feelings generated in our heads and bodies for the truth. And yet they are not. We generate thoughts and feelings based on millions of experiences stored in our brains as guidelines to deal with daily life. But their… Read More »Observe
If we try to be positive at any price, laughing away pain or just ignoring when things go down the drain, we are not gaining anything. In contrary. For someone who is struggling, it’s damaging to hear toxic positivity from friends or see people on social media saying to “just stay positive”. Why can things not be “bad” from time to time? What’s wrong with being sad or angry? We tend to create a segmentation between… Read More »Positivity isn’t positive