It is so easy to criticize somebody. And it is so difficult to say what we want instead. Why? Because criticism is an oblique way to avoid rejection. To tell you that you did something wrong is safer than to tell you what I need and to show you who I am. Disclosing a desire is a quite vulnerable thing to do. When I express a wish, I might get hurt in not receiving what I… Read More »Behind every criticism is a wish
It is a fact that when we take time out to relax, we’re more engaged and productive. I know that. And, it does not really land with me, or encourage me to do so. It is a myth that burnout is only work related. It comes from people doing too much and/or being in situations that are so draining emotionally that they simply burn out. We cannot do everything 100%. We have to set priorities,… Read More »Burn bright, not out!
Why do we so often not receive or materialize what we go for? Why do we downsize or even abandon our projects? Sometimes they suddenly do not feel that important anymore… But the likelihood is big that what we went for or wanted is still true, but the tension it brought up got the better of us. In order to create great stuff, in order to approach anything that feels challenging, we better learn to… Read More »Make use of your tension
Having is evidence of wanting. Boom. Literally, if you wish to know what your raw, pure, unwanted desires (or animalistic aspects of self) are, the ones hidden and suppressed in your unconscious shadow – you just need to look what you have in our life, including all these seemingly undesired circumstances. Have you ever considered that you take pleasure in the fucked up situations in your life? That there is some kind of excitement or… Read More »Having is evidence of wanting
Money is a delicate subject in our society. We all need it, we all want it. Our society believes more in money than in anything else, and of course, that makes it seem absolutely indispensable to our survival. And yet money is not just a currency. It brings up mixed feelings for most. Some might feel like never having enough, others see a ‘dirty’ side to it, some like spending and others don’t. It may… Read More »Money is love
Assumptions set us up for misunderstandings and disappointment. Why? Because we don’t see the world as it is, but as we are. Our perception is different from anybody else’s. When we assume something, we do that based on our beliefs, our fears, our hopes and the stories we make up in our minds. We assume what is most logic to us. And yet. It isn’t to everybody else. Often we assume people close to us know… Read More »Don’t make assumptions!
Communication is probably the most beautiful and most complicated thing on Earth. It has so much potential – and so much potential for misunderstanding. When I say something that hurts you, I can naturally assume that this is not my fault as I did not intend to hurt you. So no reason to apologize, to admit that I was wrong (it is so hard to be wrong!). But what if I was responsible for my… Read More »Who’s responsible when someone gets hurt?
When talking about the masculine and feminine, we often rather compare these two, instead of looking at the beautiful marriage of both – in all of us. Masculine and feminine are archetypes relating to the energy moving through us and every creation. In other traditions they are named yin and yang, or shiva and shakti. Everyone of us has both feminine and masculine qualities, independent from which gender you are or feel you belong to.… Read More »Create powerfully using both masculine and feminine energy
We are trained to appear strong and successful. To be shiny and glamorous, to be Instagram-able and untouchable. As a consequence we literally become untouchable. We disconnect from feeling, from being open to the world, from others. There is no connection with anything when we are protecting ourselves from being seen: you cannot connect a plug when there is a lid on it. You cannot plant a tree on a piece of concrete, you can’t… Read More »Vulnerability is the door
Words matter most when spoken with intention. When I have a fight with my partner because I feel not respected by him/her acting in a certain way, I can either address this from a position of “I am right and you are wrong and I want you to know that and to change that”. Or I can come from an intention of: “I want our relationship to be the most loving and amazing on the… Read More »Intention matters